It was the m-i-l’s birthday last Wednesday. Every year from late November/early December she starts saying that ‘someone’s’ birthday is in January. Well, yeah a LOT of someone’s have birthdays in January but apparently no-one really bothers for this ‘someone’s’ birthday. Not that this bothers that ‘someone’.
After a number of years of this you get to the point where you start not to disagree. A bit like when ‘someone’s’ birthday arrives and ‘someone’ says they don’t get any presents or cards and again after years of ‘Well, you got a card off blah, blah, blah and blah, who else did you expect one off?’ ‘Well no-one’. Or as you are sitting next to the two vases filled with flowers that you had delivered, and annually blanched over paying that much for flowers that last two weeks you ask…
‘Other than us and your no 1 son, who do you get presents off?’
‘Nobody.’
‘Well didn’t we get you the flowers?’
‘Yes.’
‘Did you get a present off no 1 son?’
‘No.’ Now I have always interpreted this to mean ‘not yet’ as for all his quirks and foibles I can’t believe B’s brother wouldn’t get her a gift.
This year the m-i-l got a gift off her cleaner. (Yes she agreed to a cleaner after the visit from Environmental Health – I jest there of course – it’s the one my s-i-l’s parents have.) A scarf and glove set – it should look just lovely in the wardrobe with the others! It was just as well the cleaner was so thoughtful as this year she was proved right and our gift is still here sitting on the table.
B was going to take it on Wednesday but I had quite finished it when we got a call to say that the mini bus driver who transports her to and from the Wednesday Club couldn’t get her front door open so, B had to go off sans present and ‘breakfast’. The m-i-l got a free extended mini bus tour out of it.
A locksmith, from a local extremely reputable firm, called out on Friday to have a look at the lock, as it has been iffy since Christmas. He rang us just before we left for the Royal regarding payment. B said the m-i-l had enough cash to pay him which she did. Apparently though along with the cash she gave him her opinion of the charges – ‘it’s a disgrace’ and ‘disgusting’. That’s us black balled there then.
So this year in line with my new addiction to crochet (following on from Share a Square – deadline extended to 30 April 2011) and after my spur of the moment attempt to cryogenically freeze her on Boxing Day failed (details to follow) and only resulted in her huddled whingeing under our throw I thought I’d made her one of her own so she could be toasty on her settee at home. Well we have experienced unusually, for us, low temperatures – and there’s always the chance of spontaneous combustion!
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