Category Archives: exercise

Walking back to healthiness – Part II

Last Monday I woke up and felt well, grumpy, unable to speak and barely able to see so basically how I typically feel when I first wake up particularly if anyone (Bernard) is expecting me to do anything (like make breakfast). However once I’d come to I didn’t feel good, I didn’t even feel okay – I felt fantastic – really fantastic .  I’d had this ‘conversation’ with a friend about how, despite having to work round the bone stuff limiting my daily activities by a vast extent compared to, as B says ‘the old Paula’, I probably still thought deep down one day I’d wake up and feel like I could conquer the world again.  And last Monday was as close as its got after myeloma put a spanner in the works.

We hadn’t all walked together for over a week and since B had put his alarm on for a really early wake up call, 13:30, to do a paint a couple of fence panels I felt able to do these myself in order that we could get to walk together, ‘cos I kinda like doing that. So Bud got two walks that day.  However for the rest of the week I was at times somewhat lacklustre – well in my opinion anyway.  Despite the several disgruntled notifications from B regarding the fence panels, especially since he’d expressly forbidden me to do them, I however put the lack of lustre down to the two walks because I must have walked milessssss and miles and miles.  B himself proforred a suggested four miles per walk – so eight miles in one day – WOW.  Well WOW for now, I once did 10 just in a morning on the treadmill to ward off the excesses of Christmas.  Heck, I’d do five after getting home from work and before hitting the weights and getting tea to get rid of a cream cake but for now –  WOW.

So Saturday I measured it on the street atlas, I measured it several times in fact, with several different kinds of measuring stuff – because wool can stretch but my dinky little tape measure wasn’t as flexible round corners.  I myself had started to think that it wasn’t as far as B thought because I have short legs, well in fact the whole of me is quite short – and indeed is about one and a half inches shorter than ‘the old Paula’.  So although I walked quite fast before anything above 3.3 miles an hour resulted in the odd skipped step/start of a jog.  Now with this in mind and the fact that I walk a lot slower than I did it dawned on me that to get this walk done in the hour and a half it usually takes would be nigh on impossible if it was anywhere near four miles.

So as the saying goes ‘what can’t speak can’t lie’ and the tape/wool/ruler says 2.5 miles and 2.75 absolute maximum even with a bit of creative cornering.  So much for thinking that I take not so much my life in my hands but my femur lesion in my stride on every walk due to the speed I go.   I guess it’s back to my extreme sport being using Signature Needle Arts Stiletto Point knitting needles!

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Walking back to healthiness

After sharing written details of our current doggy walk I though I’d take some pics.  Some turned out to be more than the 70, so I narrowed it down to 50ish and even got B to give them the once over to see if they gave a good impression of our daily outing.  I thought I’d take a pic every time we turned a corner or the view changed – turns out there’s a lot of corners!

Part way down there’s pics of a blue bridge railing.  Someone must have pasted arty pics (like really arty – not ‘arty’ as a euphemism for rude) to the main uprights and someone else must have taken exception and spray painted over the images in black.  There’s just one that they missed.  This happened once before about four years ago when I used to cycle home this way and pics appeared on the opposite side of the posts and these too were defaced.

I would like to point out before anyone alerts the authorities that the last pic is for artistic purposes only and Bud doesn’t usually get to drink like this – he doesn’t get to drink at all!  Just kidding we have a portable bowl – my hands.

Doesn’t it look a long way – doesn’t it? It does though doesn’t it?  And that’s just half of it – I mean on holiday we walked five kilometers and it has to be further than that, right?  Following a discussion on Friday I measured it on the map – I was so disappointed.  I’ll share the grand total tomorrow along with THAT headstone.

We are engaging in a modified lifestyle plan

It includes the following…

Daily

Intake

Excluding

Treats

this is to be combined with

Expending

Xtra

Energy

Regularly

Cutting

Inches from

Sagging

Extremeties

I may have suspected this was necessary when I had to buy a pair of size 14 trousers to take on holiday.  I think the equivalent size in the States is about 357!  And then I found this…

That was July 2007!  Let’s take a shufty at August 2010 – don’t panic or reach for the sick bag I have more clothes on…

I am now off to eat a someting to cheer me up – ohhhhhhhhhhhhh no I can’t do that now, I know I’ll go and kick Bernard instead  – that should do the trick!

Lay off the exercise!

I’m sure you’ve all seen those programmes, Jerry Springer, Maury, etc even if it’s just as you hastily flick past whilst channel surfing.

‘Tell your husband why you’ve brought him here today?’

‘Little Jim Bob Wafflebottom Jnr may not be yours!’

‘What?????????’

‘Did you ever suspect that you may not be the daddy?’

‘No!’

‘Never?’

Close up of cute chubby black baby.

Cut back to blond haired blue eyed Aryan looking couple

‘No!’

‘Well we have the results.  In the case of Little Jim Bob Wafflebottom Jnr you are…… NOT the father!’

I’ve never understood why people would go on those shows to share their secrets, well now I do.

Meet Sean. We did.  On the ‘landing’ at 10z at the Royal on Friday where Sean asked had I found my house keys.  I assume I displayed a somewhat horrified facial expression.

Sean:  ‘He still doesn’t know.’  Clue in the title of the post – DON’T TELL BERNARD!

B:  ‘What keys?’ or ‘Have you lost your keys?’ – It was one of those two I can’t remember exactly I was in shock.  St Anthony’s not helped so far, Sandy.

Fortunately Joan came out of the unit to give me a hug because I’d knit a little Myeloma Buddy for her grand-daughter who is only a few weeks old and B was distracted briefly.  There were some subsequent questions but fortunately I was saved by the lift.

Back to Maury – People chose to air their dirty (filthy) laundry on these shows because their husbands don’t start asking for intimate details of when they last had the keys, what time was it exactly, what were they wearing, what was the weather like, etc.  They have a disbelieving reaction in front of the audience and then you get a breather and get to chat to Sean about myeloma, and it’s only after you leave Sean and company at Phelbotomy and are approaching the coffee shop that B says ‘When were you going to tell me about the keys?’  – I’m gonna go with never if I couldn’t find them.

Then you get another reprive because a lady in the queue has myeloma.  How do you know this – well as I’ve read previously about receipients of the MM award (well except me), she was really nice, funny and pleasant  so I thought she must have myeloma.   Okay, what really happened was she commented on the sharpness of the knitting needles I had sticking precuariously out of my box and how she could do herself a mischief if impaled on them.  She then asked me how I was doing.  I didn’t know her from Adam and she’s enquiring about my well being.  She said her grandson has lukemeia, so I said that I had a blood cancer too, myeloma and it turns out she does.  Diagnosed last November.  I looked well, she looked well and B looked like he was going to have a fit if I didn’t tell him what I wanted to drink!  Her grandson is six – what a ________________ (insert own words, mine would have made a docker blush).

We sit down and it’s back to the keys – are you sitting down?  It’s a good job I was.

B:  ‘I suppose it’s my fault for telling you to take them with you.’  (Now he hadn’t managed to get any sleep before we left home so I know there’s not a pod under the bed.)

Me:  ‘Er, no.  It’s actually just as well you made me take the car key off and leave that at home.’

B:  ‘I wondered why you were using the side door keys.  We’ll get you some more cut.’

So thanks Sean, really!

Prior to this we had met our new consultant – not the one I expected but apparently two of them share the clinic.  Fortunately I had heard very good things about this doctor and he is a professor too – I just refuse to see anybody less now.  It was just as well I knew how well regarded and loved he is by his patients because there was one downside – he wears a white coat.  I’ve never been any good with anything medical even regular doctor’s appointments – but previously I’d had so few of them, about five in the last 30 years, so it wasn’t that big of a problem, and obviously I’ve gotten over this phobia, needs must and all that, but white coats still freak me out a bit, and now I’ve got past that too.

We sat there whilst he went through the blood results – went through the blood results – okay I typed that twice but the last consultant didn’t even say the blood results were okay, not okay or I seemed to be full of blackcurrant cordial instead of blood.

Now restrictions aren’t as stringent on crowds but common sense is advised – er, well, good job B has enough for both of us.

Acupuncture is okay.  This did produce a pause, apparently because there can be a risk of hepatitis but when I said my acupuncturist is also a nurse, the Prof was satisfied her standards of hygiene would be good.

Normally I’d have to get my prescriptions from our GP but the Prof gave me a prescription there and then for the Aciclovir and Septrin – even asking how I would like to take the Septrin as there are two options.  I asked about Bonefos and whether I could take it once a day rather than two (1,600mg), Prof double checked – yes I can – would I like some adding to the prescription now – oh okay then.

B asked about surgery on the collapsed vertebra but the Prof said this is done as a last resort and since I’m not in pain with it I don’t think I’d consider it just for the sake of gaining back an inch in height.

Good news for B

Takeaways are now acceptable.  We had one on Friday and it was gorgeous.  They’d missed us and the nice man from the takeaway asked how things went when I placed the order.

Lay off the exercise – Why B thinks this is good news I don’t know, only the other week he said if he could wrinkle his nose (think bewitched) I wouldn’t have myeloma – awwww, don’t get the hankies out yet though – this was followed by I’d also have a hot body – still thinking awwwww?

I had been getting a bit of not pain, more stiffness in my lower back last week.  I’d done 20 mins on the exercise bike, moved up to the big elastic band and done more driving than usual.  It’s more when I get up from sitting and walk, for a short distance, like I’ve had a bit of a mishap (although standing up ironing today for half an hour aggravated it a bit).  The Prof thought it was unlikely to be the myeloma but if I was still getting problems they’d x-ray it next time we went however I should go back if I get any numbness in my legs or it gets worse – and lay off the exercise! L  This was perhaps helped along by B doing the ‘Paula’s problem is she pushes herself too much’ routine.

So this week I’m going to do nothing but knit and eat – we’ll see how B feels about me pushing myself when I look like Violet Beauregarde and he has to grease up the door frame to get me out of the house!  And I wonder if I can change Professors until I get one that says ‘Yeah no worries, exercise all you want, just remember to stop if you hear something snap’.

Now here’s a funny thing…

Don’t you just love the dog’s attitude it’s really ‘wearing’ that hat – as opposed to any the dog I know who would be rubbing their head along the floor and pawing at it.  In case anyone is tempted to purchase one – here’s a link to the etsy shop which sells them!

No, the funny peculiar as opposed to funny ha-ha thing is muscle soreness.  I suppose it’s to be expected but from exercising with the elastic band to using the weed whacker – thanks to Sandy we no longer have a strimmer, we now whack weeds

‘Hey B, do you fancy doing some weed whacking?’

Sounds so much more exciting than

‘That could do with strimming.’

B didn’t think it was a good idea on my part to weed whack and got a little bit huffy when I stated politely (really) that if I didn’t do it who was going to.  And then yesterday when he hoovered (you will be pleased to learn I don’t hoover, for two reasons it doesn’t agree with my back and I HATE it) I asked if he would do the two back bedrooms as well.  I was in the smaller of the two and it turns out that he hoovers as far as the cord will stretch from the other room!!!!!!!!

Anyhoo, enough husband whacking, getting back to the point, my muscles seem to get a little bit sorer for a bit longer than I would expect.  This could be due to lazing around, otherwise known as convalescing, and them getting used to this, that any weight lost on ‘holiday’ was lean tissue rather than fat (what a swizz) or lack of a more nutritious diet.   I have included more fruit, mostly tinned, since my appetite has picked up but I probably need to eat more protein now and then I’ll be able to move up to the BIG elastic band!

Elastic Band Exercises

I exercised on Saturday with an elastic band.

I always thought they were for fluffy females who didn’t want to lift real weights.  So I was sitting watching B play one of the match 3 games that I  got a bit stuck on previously as this wasn’t ‘really’ exercising and was doing various things with the band.  Whilst doing some bicep curls the end shot out from under my foot and pinged into the air somewhat near B.  Fortunately because he was concentrating so much on the game, and trying to show that he could do it if I couldn’t, he didn’t notice how close it came to whacking him in the kisser.

After one set of 20 reps of curls, triceps extensions, pec flyes, lateral raises and back pulls I was pooped and breathing heavily.  After lunch I had a kip.  I wouldn’t mind but it was the easier of the two bands and it’s made my muscles ache – which is good – but it’s an elastic band!

Maybe I should have started off with a regular elastic band and maybe I should consider selling the six foot 20kg Olympic barbell that’s in the garage!

I think this is my Blood Doctor

Q: Doctor, I’ve heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?

A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that’s it… don’t waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that’s like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.

Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?

A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.

Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?

A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms up!

Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?

A: Well, if you have a body and you have fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.

Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?

A: Can’t think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain…Good!

Q: Aren’t fried foods bad for you?

A: YOU’RE NOT LISTENING!!! ….. Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they’re permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?

Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?

A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.

Q: Is chocolate bad for me?

A: Are you crazy? HELLO Cocoa beans ! Another vegetable!!! It’s the best feel-good food around!

Q: Is swimming good for your figure?

A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.

Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?

A: Hey! ‘Round’ is a shape!

Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets.