Now here’s a funny thing…

Don’t you just love the dog’s attitude it’s really ‘wearing’ that hat – as opposed to any the dog I know who would be rubbing their head along the floor and pawing at it.  In case anyone is tempted to purchase one – here’s a link to the etsy shop which sells them!

No, the funny peculiar as opposed to funny ha-ha thing is muscle soreness.  I suppose it’s to be expected but from exercising with the elastic band to using the weed whacker – thanks to Sandy we no longer have a strimmer, we now whack weeds

‘Hey B, do you fancy doing some weed whacking?’

Sounds so much more exciting than

‘That could do with strimming.’

B didn’t think it was a good idea on my part to weed whack and got a little bit huffy when I stated politely (really) that if I didn’t do it who was going to.  And then yesterday when he hoovered (you will be pleased to learn I don’t hoover, for two reasons it doesn’t agree with my back and I HATE it) I asked if he would do the two back bedrooms as well.  I was in the smaller of the two and it turns out that he hoovers as far as the cord will stretch from the other room!!!!!!!!

Anyhoo, enough husband whacking, getting back to the point, my muscles seem to get a little bit sorer for a bit longer than I would expect.  This could be due to lazing around, otherwise known as convalescing, and them getting used to this, that any weight lost on ‘holiday’ was lean tissue rather than fat (what a swizz) or lack of a more nutritious diet.   I have included more fruit, mostly tinned, since my appetite has picked up but I probably need to eat more protein now and then I’ll be able to move up to the BIG elastic band!

Patchwork Quilt

Earlier this year I joined the esty baby shower and agreed to give two gifts to etsy new moms.  I thought it would give me something to do.  Here’s the first one.  This mom had no preferences at all but as I had quite a lot of spare cotton fabric I decided to give a patchwork quilt a go.  Something I’ve only done a couple of times in the past. 

I used it as an opportunity to see how long something like this would take to make and whether it would be worthwhile to make them to sell. 

It was completely done on the sewing machine even the edging. 

I probably should have spent a little more time with the iron before I took the pics.

Fortunately the etsy mom in question from House of Mouse loved it!

Removable Wall Art

I do, well did, most of our decorating.  B did some ceilings because he is so much taller than me.  I’m now 5′ 1 and a bit” and he’s still 6′ 2″.  The most notable being the dining room ceiling when he neglected to cover the mahogany bannister which we have now painted white, which is a pain the behind with all the fiddly bits. 

However I don’t do wallpapering.  I tried it twice and well let’s just leave it at that.  I think it’s the glue issue.  I’m not good with glue or maybe too good, it ends up everywhere  hands, clothes, hair, everywhere except where it’s supposed to be!

So I stenciled some of the walls.  Most people upon seeing it for the first time think it is wallpaper – I can’t decide whether that’s a complement or an insult.  I take it as the former.

Here’s my efforts …

       

But now I’ve come across these on etsy – Charming Wall Art – Oh, the possibilities are endless.

                    

I want my fridge to look like that – first of course I’d need that type of fridge.

I somehow don’t think mine would look like these with the sticking down involved, my wavy lines would be straight, the straight ones would be wavy and the text would be illegible – a bit like B’s language if he came home and I’d actually put one of these on the wall!  But there’s no harm in looking.

Tommy Crisis and 1172 Dinosaur

Handknit organic fox fibre cotton blanket and handmade patchwork quilt and hot water bottle. Does she think she can get round me like this?

I don’t know what that blue thing is. Maybe if I don’t look it will go away. Must be the effects of the drugs.

I’ll just lie here and flash my stitches and make her feel more guilty. She’s even stuck both back legs on the same side of that blue thing.

We had a problem last night. A good day was had by all and then Tommy ate a needle and thread!

I wasn’t too sure he had but had seen him doing that kind of caramel in mouth movement reached forward to get hold of his head and saw something shiny in his mouth. Grabbed him to look closer but whatever it was disappeared. He ended up on his back with his legs in the air and me poking about in his mouth. Nothing. Checked the quilt. Nothing. Shook the quilt desperately. Nothing. Went upstairs to check pin cushion. Squeezed until two needles appeared. About right don’t keep more than that in there but still unsure. Tommy seemed fine.

Phoned the nearest vet who fortunately had not yet switched to answerphone and explained. They gave me number of nearest out of hours vet. Bernard was getting ready for work. As you can imagine he was totally unimpressed. Rang them and explained. They said I could take him in for examination. As you know I can’t yet drive as driving test last week was snowed off (now booked for 12 February).

Rang next door neighbour who unfortunately was just about to go out. Rang other neighbour and off we went to the vets after letting Auntie Ann know. Tommy as perky as anything and considered himself out on a jolly refusing to sit on my fleece which I frantically threw down on seat to save it getting hairy after he refused point blank to sit on floor. End up sitting on reusable carrier bag inside as far away from me as he could get.

So we buzzed out way into the vets which is a PDSA clinic in the day and a chargeable out of hours service at night so very utilitarian. Benches round the edge and enclosed reception counter. I explained and nurse went to speak to vet. I looked at sign on reception asking urgently for kitchen roll and wondered why. Looked down and found out why. Tommy was standing on three legs over an increasing large puddle!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I grasped the kitchen roll next to the plea and ripped the remaining FOUR sheets off. Well that just about covered it but no way soaked it up. Nurse came back and I sheepishly asked for more kitchen roll, she looked enquiringly. ‘He’s just wee’d!’ ‘Oh, don’t worry about it I’ll clean it up.’

I hung my head in shame. I’d potentially let someone else’s dog eat a needle and thread and then he’d had the opportunity to relieve himself outside but no I let him cock his leg up in reception. And it was purposeful not the cow down panic ‘I’m in a vets’ whoosh but a calm ‘I need a wee and I’m having one here’.

After several isn’t he lovelies he was on the table being poked and prodded. To the general consensus of ‘better safe than sorry’ and that’ll be at least £492 I deserted him there. He was fine right up until the nurse took him through the door to the ‘back’ and then he started dragging his feet. I felt awful.

We came home with the intention of collecting him about an hour and a half later when he came round. Updated Bernard before he went to work and phoned Auntie Ann. Hadn’t had any tea but couldn’t face any. Started cleaning. What seemed like five minutes later realised mobile had just rang. Hunt to find it. TWO missed calls. Was that the house phone. Hunt to find that as I had put in down on way to find mobile!!!! Normally good in a crisis but felt totally responsible. It was the vet he had swallowed the needle and they were going to go in for it. It was in his stomach. Rang Auntie Ann again. Carried on cleaning. Brother in law rang. Carried on cleaning and attempted to check out in Memoriam verse for father in law’s anniversary. Friend rang. Carried on cleaning. Face book message from nephew. Internet down. Brother in law rang. Cleaned more. Now 23:15. Rang vets. Informed she was in a consult but Tommy was in recover and doing okay. Vet would ring me back when finished. Texted Auntie Ann. She rang. Cleaned even more. Bernard rang 23:45. Nearly cleaned everything except kitchen sink and vet rang.

Tommy was okay needled and thread retrieved. He didn’t like his hat. We could collect him in morning. Hat??? Finished cleaning shower. Realised hadn’t put washer on with Tommy’s blanket in it. Switched washer on. Had shower. Went to bed 0:45. Put alarm on for 2:30. Didn’t think I was going to get to sleep and then its 2:30. Got up. Put blanket in drier. Went back to bed. 6:30 Bernard rang. Anything else from supermarket. Steam cleaned floors. Got dressed. Upset Bernard.

How touchy are some husbands after being informed that the vet’s bill comes to £1,172.91! I was getting dressed upstairs, he was in the kitchen.

B: ‘Oh no, I got the wrong dog food!’

Me: ‘Why?’

B: ‘WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHY?

Me: ‘How?’

B: ‘WHAT DO YOU MEAN HOW?’ (Right Shirty Gertie)

I had at this point to go downstairs as shouting from the top seemed to be making matters worse despite the fact that going downstairs to sort this URGENT matter out meant that I wasn’t upstairs getting dressed so we weren’t late picking Tommy up which would also result in upset!

Me: ‘What I mean is what do you mean you got the wrong one oh light of my life?’ Thinking dog food’s dog food, we still have a tin the cupboard, I’m in my jim jams and half asleep and want to go get Tommy, stuff the dog food.

B: ‘Well the one we’ve already got says chicken in loaf and these 12 tins say in jelly. What does that mean?’

Me: ‘How the £%& do I know’ well it was either that or ‘I’m not sure but I’m sure it will be alright.’

So we went for Tommy and dropped off a pack of kitchen roll and B asked whether we got any money off for that and the vet said ‘No, but you didn’t need to do that. That’s nice of you. I feel so bad that you’re having to pay.’

‘Did I tell you’ I enquired going for the sympathy vote ‘that I was using the needle to make a toy for Tommy?’

‘No’ the vet said ‘It may have been cheaper to buy one for £2.00.’

So we went through and saw the x-ray and saw the needle and thread and the vet said again that he was distraught with his ‘hat’ and the penny dropped. And when Bernard said ‘Hat?’ I was able to demonstrate and say ‘Lampshade’. And in he came with this huge lampshade round his neck and dragging on the floor and looking incredibly awkward. And we saw the stitches on his little puppy tummy and I gave him a hug and apologised.

We got home and he had a lie down and B put a cushion under his head and went to bed. I then put a blanket over him and then he seemed a little cold so I gave him the hot water bottle I got for Christmas and then he woke up as was a little dazed and confused looking and then we went back to sleep again. Slept through about five phone calls. Woke up, followed me upstairs which he wasn’t supposed to do in case he damaged his stitches. Wagged his tail at a friend that visited. Went back to sleep. Ate a little. Auntie Ann and Uncle Ray called and he perked up. He had a little sleep on his back so I could fully see his stitches and feel even worse. I cooked some rice to go with chicken AA brought and he ate it all (B and I had bacon butties). And currently he is asleep at my feet.

He even managed to pick up the dinosaur which I finished while he slept this morning. If this survives once he is feeling better I intend to list them in my etsy shop as tested by Tommy and call them 1172 Dinosaurs in view of the fact that this one cost £1,172. (Fortunately we are getting reimbursed).