Short Break

If I said I was having an impromptu mid week short break where’s the first place that springs to mind?  As much as I’d like to say ‘No, you’re wrong, I’m in Prague’ if you did say the Royal in Liverpool you would indeed be correct.

I’m having my peritoneal dialysis (PD) catheter/cannula fitted today and was expecting to come in this morning at 7 am.   However about ten minutes before dialysis finished yesterday a nurse off the ward I’m currently on came and introduced himself and mentioned coming in yesterday, had I brought my stuff – well of course I hadn’t!  After consulting with the doctor who is putting the catheter in and I needed to ring last night about 5pm as there was someone due to be discharged between 5 and 6 pm.  Poo!

On one hand at least I didn’t have to go to bed at home thinking ‘Aahhhhh I have to get up and go in the morning’ but on the other it’s another night in hospital that I wasn’t expecting.  In fact it might be two as some people stay in the night it’s put in particularly if they have dialysis here the day after.  B thinks this is quite a good idea – I do in theory but in reality it sucks – I’d much rather be in my own bed with Buddy.

I’d had my day planned around going in on Wednesday morning, I was going to Armchair Yoga in the afternoon, then maybe a walk with B and Bud, my last bath and then Chris was probably coming round – so that would take my mind off things – because the insertion of any line gets me a little windy but this one in particular has.  So I went to yoga anyway, missed a friend who called with some homemade jam and a bag of treats for Bud by 10 minutes (‘Why didn’t you ring me on my mobile’ I asked B ‘I thought you’d be driving’ as it was it was just as well because i’d left it at home), took a call from Chris saying she should be able to call if she had a car and then said she’d take me in if I was going, took a call from the renal nurse at practically bob on five saying that there was a bed free (B handed me the phone!), half packed, went rushing off into the wood opposite wearing a dress with no tights and pink wellies after I saw a little Scottie dog out there apparently on its own – said dog rushed off like the clappers when I shouted it and it turned out there was someone with it but miles away, showered, forced down half my tea, got in the car with Chris and claimed my bed.  I think we got here at eight ish.

When the nurse booked me in last night it turned out that I’m only having the catheter/cannula installed this afternoon!  Usually they are done in a morning but they’d checked with the doctor and it’s only this afternoon so really I could have stayed at home – I’ve only had the laxative this morning as well.

I’d taken my Thalidomide extra early to get it in before I left home and so I didn’t have to start saying to the renal staff ‘You need to put gloves on to dispense that one’ so when Chris went at half nine I started typing this but was nodding off so I ended up watching ‘Big Fat Gypsy Weddings’ on the netbook was well away by eleven. The doctor woke me up apologetically at quarter to one to clerk me in  – she was still on at eight this morning.

I’m on a ward of six as opposed to the usual four in haematology but surprisingly (and against Chris’s opinion too) there was no disturbances during the night (other than the doctor), there was blood taken at about seven thirty ish but I was awake then anyway and I got to have the laxative drink – which has worked you’ll be glad to know!  I needed to let them know if it didn’t and I could have had another one because, and here’s something I hadn’t thought of, the nurse said she didn’t want me getting the urge to go while I was having anything installed.

Oh, and you know you see and hear all those jokes about hospital gowns opening at the back and exposing people’s rear ends well I’d never seen this in real life – until last night.  A lady with a gown on and a cardy got up to go to the loo and there she was with a HUGE gap in the gap – fortunately she had some sort of undergarment on – but it was like those people who rubber neck at road accidents I didn’t want to look but had to fight to keep my eyes away – Chris clocked the sight and we both started tittering.  We then had a discussion on how it’s neigh on impossible to do with the way gowns close now but then it happened again this morning but with someone else!  And then the first lady had apparently taken her’s off completely – fortunately I didn’t see and this I only glanced over (I didn’t want to it just happened) when I heard one of the staff suggest that she might like to put it back on – I only saw a bit of shoulder.

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6 responses to “Short Break

  1. Good luck today my lovely, will be thinking of you and praying for a smooth and as painfree procedure as possible. ….aye those gowns can reveal a little too much at times…..funny how you can’t stop looking tho sometimes!!! Xxxxxx

  2. Paula, if you all speak English, then we must speak some other dialog….Linda and I were laughing at some of the terms you used:
    “needed to ring”, “little windy”, “bob on five”, “woods opposite”, “wellies”, “like the clappers”, “well away by eleven”, “to the loo”, and “started tittering”. Your desciption of the open hospital gowns was too vivid a mental picture…..I almost started tittering. Please take care and thanks for sharing. Ez

  3. Good luck with your procedure! I, too, love to read these Britisms, though
    I would have thought it was the laxative that would have you “a little windy.”
    ;o)

  4. I bet you never knew you were so funny! 😉

    Oh sorry about the unscheduled holiday. I suppose it’s a mini-break. Hope you packed your big knickers!

  5. I’m sorry too that you got held up in there… especially with the scary sights.

    Was thinking though, with your creative design talent, why don’t you do us all, (patients and those who must be with us), a favor and design alternative wardrobe styles. You know, the ‘on the ward’ look. You might call it the, “Don’t Leave Your Buttie Behind,” line of hospital fashion by Ms. P. I can see multiple colors, and sizes, like bright red for oversize guys with lettering in the rear that says, “Wide load…Use care in passing.”

    Heck, with this network of knitters and sewers, there’s potential for a cottage industry, manufacturing to supply the demand for Ms. P’s Ward Fashions. I’d buy a couple… Of the red ones!

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