B punished me for being bad

He made me watch The Jeremy Kyle show while we ate our lunch!  How barbaric is that?  For those of you not familiar with this high brow presentation it’s kinda like a low brow version of Jerry Springer.  Seriously the people that appear on the show are so, um well, rough is probably the politest way of putting it.  And what makes it worse is that this applies to ALL the guests, not just the ones who are having their baby DNA matched to the 10th possible father but everyone.  There was a show a few weeks back that was about a health issue and the parents looked as though they’d just been asking people for change outside the studio.  I could only think wardrobe was responsible for their clothes as it seemed bizarre that they should look so unkempt too.  Well either that or there is a dress policy on the application form.

Anyhoo what had I done to deserve this punishment.  It’s all the blood’s fault.  I had been feeling pretty good anyway from Tuesday but after the two units of blood yesterday I felt particularly good today.  This resulted in me doing something rash whilst B and Bud were out walking.  In the midst of getting some paper out of the loft to wrap B’s birthday presents I thought ‘I wonder if I could put the boxes of Christmas decorations away myself’, as B has been threatening to do it since well, Christmas actually.

It turned out I could, with a bit of a struggle I admit.  Now I knew B wasn’t going to be happy but I thought it would take him a while to notice they were gone since most were under my sewing table but I was only finishing putting the last box up there when the two Bs got back.  So when we sat down for our watercress sandwiches shortly after I got subjected to Jeremy Kyle and as if that wasn’t bad enough B turned over before we found out if the baby was fathered by the guy who had been on the show once before to tell his then girlfriend that he had a baby with his ex-girlfriend, yes the same baby that his ex-girlfriend was now saying had a 50/50 chance of being his.

Needless to say I won’t be doing it again this year, I couldn’t take another episode.  Although I’ll be safe for the next few weeks.  We got a phone call at six this evening, when I thought I was safe for the day, informing me that there was a bed available at the Royal and I should go in at lunchtime tomorrow.  It’s a good job I’ve only one thing left to do on my list plus it’ll give my back a chance to get out today’s exertion.

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5 responses to “B punished me for being bad

  1. Best wishes, Paula. We’re all pulling for you. Hope the time will pass quickly.

  2. All the best, Paula! Wishing you an uneventful holiday at the Royal (preferably without being subjected to Jeremy Kyle and his rather dubious guests!).

  3. Cruel and Unusual punishment, indeed! Intending a positive outcome from the visit at the Royal and will be having you on my Intention List all the time!

  4. They make the cast of Shameless look like Royalty, not that I’ve watched either programme.

    Have a “great” holiday, you might even get a little old lady who should be on Jezza in the bed opposite.

  5. Torture indeed! The Waiting Room had The Real Deal on the big screen at FL’s last appointment. Ever seen that? Vacant teenage yoof tries to flog grandpa’s watch to Barbara Cartland’s granny with cut-saways to scenes of an auction. The sound was off so I have no idea what happened. The yoof has still not blinked, a week later.
    Good luck at the Royal! 🙂

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