Don’t tell Bernard!

I can’t find my house keys.  Now we know I tell B everything sooner or later but this I can’t.  I had a spell when we first got married out being a bit lax with keys and basically as husbands can do he’s never forgotten it.  ‘Have you got your keys?’ being a common question in our house.

B suggested I take my keys on holiday with me ‘Just in case’ of what I don’t know.  B also suggested that I take the ‘my’ car key off the key ring again ‘Just in case’ and again of what I don’t know –  maybe in case I bopped him on the noggin whilst he has visiting and made off in the car with my IV stand and in my jim jams.  Turns out it was just as well.

I distinctly remember leaving them in one of my suitcases when I unpacked on holiday.  Then the friend I borrowed the cases off needed them back as she was going away for a few days and I was still on holiday.  So I took them out and… what?  I thought I’d put them in the drawer which I emptied when I packed and I’m pretty sure that when they strip and sanitise the room for the next holiday-maker they would have noticed keys with a large Judge Death metal key ring.

I unpacked in stages on the evening I got home as it was too much in one go and I’ve checked the place I always leave my keys and they are definitely not there.

B doesn’t suspect yet because we have a spare set for the back door and garage so I’ve been using them.  I had been using the front door as the garage door sometimes sticks (since an incident one Christmas Day when I was learning to drive when I drove, slowly, into the garage doors) and I couldn’t always manage to get them shut again with my back, however with good weather and a better back that’s not an issue at the moment.  However if I have to use the front door I’m stuck as we don’t have a spare set.  Doh!

I’ll have to have a systematic late ‘spring’ clean.  B won’t suspect a thing.  I’ll just have to remember to make sure the marching band and dancing girls don’t make too much of a noise during the celebrations when I do find them!

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4 responses to “Don’t tell Bernard!

  1. St. Anthony is a wonderful finder of lost things. You must make a prayer to him for assistance. In your supplication, you also must tell him what you will do to thank him for helping you… like “I will make a donation of kibbles to the animal rescue league,” or “I will give 14 Little Old Ladies _______ (you fill in the blank)” or something meaningful as a ‘gift’ in return for finding those keys.

    Then you wait. And usually within a day or so, you will be guided to go and look for something or you will be doing something else and they will suddenly appear… like B coming into a room and saying, “These were in the side pocket of my bathrobe,” or something equally mysterious. Honestly the old boy has helped me out numerous times. I will intend he is doing the same for you… let us know how and when!!!

  2. The sooner you get a puppy, the sooner you will have someone to blame, something that can’t say “it wasn’t me.” When the kids were little I could blame them for everything, until they got old enough to answer questions coherently that is. 😦 (He he.)

  3. Can imagine you’ll be promising “14 little old ladies an enema”LOL …..x They might help you find the keys before you locate a tube of the correct diameter?

  4. You don’t think he was being helpful and “tidied them up” for you? Anyway, keys are greatly over-rated. Nobody would ever expect you to leave your door unlocked, so you are probably totally safe to do so!

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