I didn’t think it was possible for football to become less appealing and then the world cup started. I can be ‘watching’ football whilst knitting, and possibly reading, and not notice if someone scores, unless of course it’s a side B is routing for and then although I didn’t see it I hear it. It’s like the swirly pattern you can get on windows media player – a series of random actions that just don’t gel into a meaningful whole.
And now this world cup is accompanied by an auditory assault in the form of the vuvuzelas, so for the whole of the match it sounds like you’re about to be attacked by extremely irate hornets or you start thinking you might have tinnitus. I don’t think there was so much buzzing in those B-movie killer bee films!
Fortunately I can retreat to the laptop and complain about it here when B gets fed up of me saying things like…
‘That noise is really annoying.’
‘Why’s that player got long sleeves?’
‘Why’s that player got a blue band on his arm?’ – I actually remembered that from last time I asked and stopped myself
‘It’s no wonder there’s always extra time the amount of time they spend on the ground, can’t they just walk it off?’
‘That noise is REALLY getting on my nerves.’
And then Monday I got a detailed explanation, accompanied by finger pointing in mid air to show the player positions, of the off side rule because it had changed since last time I asked. I think B may have been getting his own back!